Insemination Day!

Today is insemination day! Insemination day is definitely a love/hate relationship. I love that it’s bringing me closer to having a baby, but hate that it isn’t guaranteed to be successful. I wish there was a way to ensure pregnancy. Every single breath that I take is for my children. I can’t wait to be in the delivery room holding my son or daughter (or both?) for the first time. Looking into his/her eyes, hearing his/her little coos, seeing his/her itty baby toes and snuggling him/her to sleep. I can’t wait to breastfeed, I can’t wait to change diapers, I can’t wait to be woken up at 2am because my baby needs me. I’m looking forward to every single aspect of parenting, even the long nights where I’m running on 2 hours of sleep. Devan and I both share this way of thinking. When we got married Devan and I became one unit, and when we have our child they will also become one with us. My heart is Devan & our children. I just want to be happy again. I know that getting pregnant isn’t going to fill the void in my heart from losing Rohen, this is something I will just have to learn to live with. I’ll never stop missing him, loving him or wishing he was here. Nothing will ever change that. I am just ready for the constant ache, the depression, and the feeling that everything in my life is so surreal to go away. The happiest time in my life was the 20 weeks I was pregnant with Rohen. Devan and I have never been happier than we were those few months. I know that when I become pregnant again we will get to feel that happiness again. All that we want from life is a family, and once I’m pregnant we will be close to having our dreams come true. I would give anything for this to be it for us. I am ready to be happy again, I’m ready to start nesting, painting and decorating a nursery, shopping for baby clothes, planning a baby shower and living my life not for myself anymore, but for my children. And really, let’s be honest, I’m ready to stop getting probed in the vagina on an almost weekly basis.

I hope this is it. I really do.

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Updates

It has been 7 weeks and 2 days since our little man left us and we are still missing him like crazy. You have good days and you have bad days. I am sure many of you are wondering what our next step is, so I figured I’d write up a blog and update everyone on what we’ve been up to since Rohen passed away.

First, we got married J Most of you already know this but for those of you that do not, on January 23rd, 2014 I finally made it legal with the love of my life. We have lived as a married couple for years now, but it wasn’t a legit marriage. When Devan started her job at Chandler Regional Hospital we found out that they offer GREAT medical/dental/vision insurance but would not recognize me (or our future children) unless we were legally married. Luckily, they will still recognize a marriage from another state even if it is not legal in Arizona. So, at the very last minute we planned a trip to New Mexico where our friends Trisha & Ethan live and got hitched! Trisha and Ethan did such a great job making the night special for us. Devan and I were expecting to blow through town, sign some papers and come home; I’m thankful for my friends who made our experience so beautiful.

Shortly after getting married I had my first doctors appointment with the fertility docs to check out all my lady parts and the news was not good. We were told that there was something in my uterus right on the lining and that if it didn’t come out with my first period we would need to have it surgically removed. Devan and I were so upset, we wanted to start trying again immediately and were not anticipating any additional roadblocks. Shane, our doctor, decided that he would wait until I had my first period and check me again, if he still saw something, he would want to do a SHG (Sonahysterogram) to find out what it is (his guesses: placenta, fibroid or polyp). After starting my period he still saw that there was something in my uterus and decided to go forward with the SHG. On day 7 of my cycle I went in for the procedure and was happy to see that whatever it was had cleared out. At this point we had already passed the point in your cycle where you could begin taking clomid (days 5-9 of your cycle) so we would have had to wait until my next period to start trying. I decided that I wanted to try it naturally, something I’ve wanted to try since the very beginning. I am 25 years old and healthy, I don’t NEED fertility drugs to get pregnant (of course they definitely help). I don’t know why but I felt very strongly about this, I feel like wasting a cycle is wasting an opportunity to get pregnant again, even though this cycle is very unlikely to result in pregnancy. The IUI success rate is on a bell shaped curve so you are most likely to get pregnant between your 2, 3 possibly 4th try. If you aren’t pregnant by your fourth try then you likely have an underlying fertility issue. I figure, even though it’s unlikely to happen this cycle, it brings me one cycle closer to it succeeding and that’s obviously our main goal. Friday, I went in for an ultra sound and had one egg. I got my trigger shot Saturday night at 9pm, and today I will be inseminated at 3pm. Unfortunately, Devan cannot be there because of work, and because she had to take three weeks off when Rohen died, immediately after starting her job at Chandler we don’t want to push our luck and have her take the day off to be there. I would do anything for her to be there with me today, as I know it will be very emotional for me. Being in that room again, getting ready for an insemination, it’s going to remind me that I’m there because I was pregnant, and now I’m not again. Not that I don’t think of Rohen daily, and am reminded daily that he is gone, and that I’m not having a baby in May. It’s just salt in a fresh wound I guess. I brought his blanket and urn to be with me today and am wearing a necklace my grandma bought me for Christmas that has his name and birthstone on it. Lisa, our nurse would normally step in to be there in place of Devan but she has a class today. Luckily, none of those people have to be in the room for me to get pregnant J

So today is the day. We are starting the journey to pregnancy and beyond all over again. My only hope is that our dreams will finally come true.

Friday, August 30th, 2013

Friday, August 30th, 2013 was just like any other day…well sort of. Devan and I had spent the morning fighting over something really stupid I’m sure … and by the end of the fight I told her that I couldn’t continue to put myself through the emotional roller coaster of trying to have a baby. What you all don’t know is that I was 9 days past an IUI at this point. Devan and I decided we’d try doing it the good ole’ fashion way and “stop trying”. Considering the way we are trying to conceive the only way we could “stop trying” would be to stop telling people about it. So that is what we did. I was inseminated on August 21, 2013…this particular insemination was much different from the previous ones we’ve gone through. So, I guess I’ll start there…

The Insemination:

We were scheduled to be inseminated at 1:30, we had been checking my follicles/eggs out the week prior and found that I had a total of FOUR big ass eggs ready for some sperm. The Doctor was actually sort of concerned because of the “risk” of multiples. I told him that having twins would be a blessing and that triplets, even though I’d want to pull my hair out, would also be a blessing so bring on the multiples. We’ve been fighting too long and hard to give up over possible multiples.  We arrived at the doctors office eager as ever. Normally our nurse, Lisa, does our inseminations, but because of how many follicles I had she brought Shane, the Dr in with us. They made a joke saying “maybe you need to have a guy do” so that is what happened. So, in the room is me, Devan, Shane, Lisa & Gina — FULL HOUSE!!!! As soon as Shane began the process I started to kind of freak out — I was thinking about the let down I would have to deal with in 2 weeks when I started my period and honestly, I wasn’t sure I could go through it again — and of course thinking about this made me cry. (Such a pansy 😉 ) Lisa and Devan came and held my hand for support (I’m telling you people, you won’t find a better group of fertility specialists) and got me through it. The insemination went smoothly after that, and the deed was done. I laid there for about 25 minutes with Devan just crying because like I said, I could deal with this NOT working, anymore.

The two week wait:

Anyone who has tried to conceive HATES the two week wait…it is the WORST two weeks of your life. You are hyper sensitive to everything happening to your body and every cramp or twinge is the baby implanting or a pregnancy symptom of some sort. Of course, 2 days past IUI it would be impossible to even have symptoms, but let me tell you, your body tricks you. Almost immediately I was nauseated – Lisa told me it was because I had such high estrogen levels for having so many eggs and that it would likely go away; and she was right. About 6-7 days after the insemination I was feeling pretty good and showed no signs of pregnancy.

Friday, August 30th, 2013

Obviously this day has meaning or it wouldn’t be the title of this blog post…I’ll pick up where I left off in the beginning — Devan and I had been fighting all morning. I was telling her I was DEFINITELY showing no symptoms of being pregnant and that I didn’t know if I could continue doing this, because of how hard the let down is. She kept on saying, you don’t know if you’re pregnant or not, its been 9 DAYS!! I was so sure I wasn’t pregnant, I wanted to prove her wrong right then and there. It was about 10am and I was at work and I decided I’d take a little break to Walgreens simply to prove Devan wrong (I know, ridiculous) I get to Walgreens and buy a 3 pack of the EPT tests…I didn’t want to pee on a stick at work and definitely couldn’t go home to do it because Devan was there so the classiness in me decided to pee in the Walgreens bathroom. I go in, pee on the stick…wait about 45 seconds and see nothing. In my head I was obviously disappointed but I had been telling myself it wasn’t going to happen anyways so I just got up to leave and go back to work. I got in the car and took a look at the test again, and there it was…the faintest pink line…the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. I immediately started crying and sped home to show Devan. I ran into the house (mind you, we’ve been fighting) and I scream for Devan. She comes out and asks me what the hell I’m even doing home and I showed her the test and said “I’M PREGNANT!!!!” Neither of us had words, we just hugged each other and cried. At this point I was 3 1/2 weeks pregnant — super early, so we decided we’d only share the news with our close family & friends. As I write this blog I am now 5 1/2 weeks pregnant and am scheduled for my first ultra sound on 9/27 at 4:30 pm. I know that will be a day that will change my life forever. None of you will be reading this blog post until at least 9/27, but I figured to keep the story fresh (how could I forget it though) I’d type it up now. For obvious reasons I have continued to be a nervous wreck (I know, stress is bad for the baby, I’m working on it) but all the blood work points to a healthy growing bambino in there, so I am hoping it stays that way.

As of now, I still don’t have many symptoms (I hear they will start full force in about 1-2 weeks, so excited for that…NOT) I have developed an obsession with pickles and macaroni and cheese, I’m finding myself being sleepier than normal and I feel like someone has removed a few parts of my brain; other than that, I feel great!

Here’s to a new journey, hopefully one full of tears of joy, rather than tears of sadness.

❤ Ashley…and tiny little sea horse alien looking apple seed baby 😉

Updates and Changes

Hello Everyone!

I wanted to touch base with everyone and let you know that Devan and I have NOT stopped trying to conceive, we just took a break from blogging because of how hard the miscarriage was/is. We miscarried on IUI #2 and since have had 4 additional unsuccessful IUI’s.

At this point, clomid is not an option anymore, its clear that it isn’t working & more aggresive treatment will be required, like injections. Devan and I discussed this, and while it was not an easy decision to come to we’ve decided that Devan will be taking a break from trying to get pregnant, and I will be jumping on the horse to try. Devan has an iregular menstral cycle that usually last 40-43 days, where as mine is the normal 28 day cycle.  My theory is that because Devan’s eggs normally don’t mature until days 20-23, the clomid did nothing but force her body to mature quicker & therefore created dud eggs (which explains the miscarriage). I talked with our nurse, Lisa, about this yesterday and she said that its possible, but that we won’t have any answers until we try injections & possibly undergo some fertility testing on Devan. Injections & Fertility testing are very costly, it will run us at least $2500 on top of what we pay for the normal IUI cycles and its just not in our budget right now.

Last month, Devan’s work announced that her position as the House Mother was going to be going away and that she would now be a full time CNA floating between all three units with her Hospice. When we first heard this news, we were DEVASTATED. Devan was very happy in her position and enjoyed the flexibility it gave her. Now, with all the changes taking place, this new position is going to work out in Devan’s favor. One thing Devan sacraficed by attempting pregnancy first was Nursing School. We decided that she would put it off until she had the baby and then finish her degree. Now, not only can she get enrolled in school but she will have 2 full days during the work week to go to daytime classes. Once she has her degree, we will be ready to start talking about having more kids, and I think thats when she will finally get her dream of being pregnant.

The decision to switch to me was not an easy one, Devan was very upset about it, she feels that being pregnant will help her heal from the miscarriage, which is understandable. So, even though its hard, we’ve decided that focusing on the negative will do nothing but bring us down, instead were focusing on the positives.

We still have a chance to have a baby!!! One of the perks of having two uterus’ in a relationship LOL!

I called Dr. Nemiro Tuesday night and discussed all of this with him & went in to the office yesterday to get all the paperwork filled out & the labs for my bloodwork. I have an appointment in about 30 minutes to get my well woman check up & all the blood work I can through my primary doctor. Everything I can’t get done there I will do at Dr. Nemiro’s office or at Labcorp.

I have SO many emotions going through my head right now!!! I’m terrified & excited at the same time. I talked with Dr. Nemiro & told him my only concern with me having the baby is that I am overweight, he said that it doesn’t concern him & that if you are disciplined during your pregnancy you will only gain baby weight….lets see if that ACTUALLY happens!

I can’t even begin to tell you how blessed Devan & I feel, despite all of the hardships we’ve had to deal with on this journey. We have our families & friends and the staff at Arizona Center for Fertility Studies are truely amazing. When I went in yesterday I was sitting on the couch in the waiting room, and our nurse, Lisa came and sat next to me on the couch. She said “So, I hear were switching it up?” I said “Yep!” Her first question — “How is Devan”, just the fact that she asked about that shows me that she truely cares about our feelings throughout this process. She proceeded to spend 30+ minutes with me discussing bloodwork & all the options I have for my first attempt. I haven’t decided if I want to do it naturally or try clomid. Lisa suggests trying clomid becuase it is a cheap drug & with a normal cycle it should help.

That’s all I really have for you all right now…today is mine and Devan’s 7 year anniversary, so thats exciting 🙂

More updates to come!!!

 

– Ashley

10mm, its a great number

The past few days have been hard for Devan & me. Every time we’ve gone to the doctor we’ve received bad news…it gets exhausting. I can’t even imagine how those going through IVF or other more intense procedures feel, I’m sure a lot of those people would gladly trade places with us. Regardless, thinking about how lucky we really are never dulls the pain during our hard times.

We started our 4th cycle with a med increase on the Clomid. We jumped from 100 to 150mg, which is a very high dose of Clomid, so high the doctors wanted us to come in every other day to monitor Devan and make sure her body was reacting okay to the medication. It started out great, everything looked normal, she had a few follicles growing and we were very optimistic. After a few visits our nurse mentioned that Devan’s uterine lining was not growing, but actually getting smaller, which is NOT good. If the uterine lining is not at 10mm they cannot proceed with the cycle. Devan’s went from 8mm, to 7mm to 6mm in a matter of days. Once I heard this I started feeling like this was NEVER going to happen for us. I actually started facing the realization that we probably won’t be having a child anytime soon and that right now just wasn’t our time. Our nurse wanted us to come in yesterday for one last look to decide if we were canceling the cycle or not. I was anxious ALL day long, I couldn’t shake the feeling of never being a mom, Devan and I even started discussing me carrying the baby rather than her. While I have NO issues carrying, and will in the future, I know its Devan’s dream to be pregnant and experience all of this, and I didn’t want to take that from her.

I listen to Pandora at work and within minutes of each other mine & Devan’s song came on and a song we’ve dedicated to our baby came on…I got so emotional I almost teared up at work, I emailed Devan and told her about it and said, I really hope that is a good sign.

4:30 rolls around and its time for our appointment, we go in and the first thing the nurse does is measure her uterine lining…IT WAS AT 10MM!!!!!!! In 48 hours it grew 4mm, we were SO excited!!!!! The scary part wasn’t over yet, because of the high dose of clomid we had to make sure Devan didn’t have too many eggs. We checked out her right ovary and found 2 fat eggs and a possible third. This immediately made me nervous because 3 eggs is the maximum amount they would want to proceed with…as she moves over to Devan’s left ovary she says “Well, the left is a dud, there’s nothing”!!! I could have kissed the nurse…(she’s pretty hott too Ha!) Finally I was able to start feeling hopeful again. Devan was triggered at 10:30pm last night and will be inseminated at 4:30 Friday. We are very hopeful that this is “our time” and that she will get pregnant. We will know for sure on 12/2/12.

So, we are 1/3 of a way towards our journey of being mommys! We have two more milestones:

– Positive Pregnancy Test

– Keeping the baby throughout the pregnancy

We’ve decided that if we are successful this attempt (and after we are out of the “danger” zone) we are going to donate our sperm to a couple who like we did, felt hopeless.

More updates to come!

❤ Ashley

More bad news.

So… It’s been almost two months since the miscarriage. It’s hard to believe.

I’ve had good days and bad days, but the good are starting to outweigh the bad. It’s been hard to feel that pang whenever I see pregnant women, babies, anything infant related. I don’t feel like its ever going to leave me completely, but I feel like most of my pain is the let down of realizing that I wasn’t going to be a mother. When I get pregnant, I know in my heart that some of that pain will the to joy. It was for that reason that we decided to immediately jump back into fertility treatments after this miscarriage. My doctor cleared me to try again right after, and we didn’t want to waste precious time.

For our third IUI attempt, I took 100mg of Clomid. I was expecting to have two eggs again, since my second IUI (the successful one) was on 100mg and I had two. Unfortunately, I only had one egg and the cycle was ultimately unsuccessful.

By this time, we were out if sperm. We skipped one month to buy more and have it shipped, and started our fourth IUI attempt last week. At my first appointment, I asked if I could try 150mg of Clomid this time to try for two or more eggs. At this appointment, Lisa (the RN) noticed that I had a large and strangely shaped something on my left ovary. It looked like a cyst, but had irregular borders and coloring. It was determined that I must have just ovulated, and this was just the burst follicle that had released the egg. I was sent home with my clomid.

At my second appointment, I had a uterine lining of 8mm (10 is needed to support an embryo) and a bunch of ok sized follicles. I went back in a couple days later and I had a uterine lining of 7mm, and some bigger follicles. This morning, I had three follicles that are around 14 to 15mm, 4mm short of where they should be. My uterine lining is now at 6mm. Lisa said she is concerned that my lining is getting smaller. This is caused by a lack of estrogen. It could be because the eggs growing in my follicles are no good, and aren’t causing my ovaries to produce enough estrogen. It could also mean that those follicles are actually cysts, and there are no eggs in them at all. I am going back Wednesday evening to see what has changed, but it’s not looking good. Most likely, this means the clomid is no longer working and ill have to stop taking it. This cycle will most likely be cancelled.

I have done a lot of damage to my body with the hormones, and we are at a point where continuing with clomid could do more harm than good.

One other option would be to take a step up to injectable hormones, which are VERY expensive and much riskier. We are planning on playing it by ear. If by some miracle my uterine lining is 10mm and I have some good eggs on wednesday, we will move forward. If not, we will sit down without doctor to discuss what our options are.

I’m struggling with accepting the fact that this is not going to play out the way I have always pictured it would. I am 23, healthy… And without a child. It feels like every time we turn a corner there is more bad news waiting for us there. There’s still hope in me, but it’s getting hard to keep smiling. To be completely honest, this process has been financially devastating and on top of everything it creates a hopeless mood. We can’t keep doing this over and over…

I’m starting to feel betrayed by my own body… Like I’m trapped inside this body that’s fighting against me.

I’ll post more as we learn more… Hopefully our doctor will have some words of encouragement. I have a feeling that we’re going to learn that this isn’t going to happen for me. I can’t help it, and I can’t shake it…

Moving on to our second attempt.

Hello folks! Last time I posted, we had just undergone the insemination and were sent home to wait until August 10th to take a pregnancy test. Waiting was really difficult. We went to Walmart and bought 15 pregnancy tests, and I used 10  of them!!!

The first test I took was on July 29th, to “test out” the HCG trigger shot. I got a very faint positive. The next test was August 3rd, and it was negative. Between the 3rd and the 10th, I took 9 tests, all negative. A few days before the 10th, I started having cramps. We both started losing faith that it had worked, with all of the negative results and the period symptoms. Sure enough, on the 11th, I started my period again.

We went in to see Janice at Dr. Nemiro’s office, and had another ultrasound done to check for cysts. I was cleared for another cycle, and given a prescription for more Clomid (last time we did 50mg, this time we are doing 100mg.) The Clomid cycle started this morning, and once again I have been super nauseated all day. I’m not looking forward to feeling this crappy for another week or so, but I just keep reminding myself that it will be worth it in the end.

We’re disappointed that it didn’t work the first time, but we’re hopeful that this one will be it. The first time chances are slim for any woman, healthy or not, but they go up by quite a bit for the second try, and even more for the third. They told us that if I go in for three cycles and don’t get pregnant and we’re discussing going for a fourth, it will be a long shot for the fourth try to work. Once three cycles have gone by without a pregnancy, they would consider me to be infertile and would recommend IVF. I’m hoping we don’t get that far! If we go three cycles and I’m not pregnant, Ashley will definitely step in to carry our baby!

Other than that, we’ve just been going with the flow. We had a nice romantic weekend in Prescott a couple of weeks ago, which was really nice. We definitely needed the getaway! We’re hoping to go back soon and bring Lennon, since Prescott is FULL of dog people. I also got a transfer to a new position within the same company that I’ve been working for, and I’m now the Housemother for our inpatient unit! It’s a lot less physical work, but a lot more clerical duties and responsibilities. It’s been fun so far on the job training with the woman I will be replacing starting on Monday. Here’s hoping that this change of pace will help me to relax and GET PREGNANT! 🙂

Our next appointment is going to be next week to determine how many follicles I have. Last time they were sloooow growers and I only ended up with one egg, so we’re hoping for AT LEAST two this time, no more than three!

Wish us luck!

Devan

The Insemination!

Today was the big day! I woke up this morning feeling really nauseated and I still had a horrible headache from last night, so I decided to call out sick from work. The HCG shot really took a lot out of me, and I’ve been having early pregnancy symptoms and headaches since Saturday.

Ashley thought that she wouldn’t be able to make it to the appointment, but her boss ended up being very understanding and let her come with me! We arrived at about 9:45am for my 10am appointment, and unfortunately we had to wait over 2 hours to get in. They were slammed, very behind, and we were getting pretty upset sitting there waiting. They did make me happy when they gave us two huge boxes of prenatal vitamin samples. The good prescription kind!

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I was really worried because the insemination was planned to be done at exactly 42 hours after the trigger shot, which would mean it would need to be done at 10:30am. When we got into the office, Gina (the RN program director of the practice) came in to do the procedure. We asked her if doing the insemination at 44 hours would be a problem, and she assured us that it would still be totally fine.

She had us verify the paperwork with the vial of sperm from our donor, and showed us the stats. The sperm sample in it’s raw state had 50% movement. After washing, all of the dead sperm were taken out, leaving us with a sample of .5cc fluid containing 14 million active sperm.Image

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They used a long catheter threaded through the cervix to inject the sperm directly into my uterus. It was actually totally fine, other than a little cramping. No big deal! Gina was training a new nurse, and she was so excited because she got to thread the catheter into my uterus. I gave her a high-five later for doing an awesome job :D Once they had it in there, they handed it over to Ashley to let her push the plunger! If she got me pregnant, she’s one sharp shooter!

After the sperm was injected, I laid flat on my back for 20 minutes just to make sure nothing came back out. While I was laying there, Ashley, the nurse and I were all talking about conception and the procedure. Ashley asked the nurse what sperm smells like (lol!) and we had a long conversation comparing the smell of sperm to other things. I have no experience, the nurse was trying to explain it but couldn’t, so Ashley opened up the vial and started sniffing!!! All three of us were sitting there sniffing the sperm vial, while a little timer with a sperm on it ticked away my 20 minutes.

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I don’t think it smelled like anything, but I had just gone to the bathroom so my hands smelled like soap. It smelled like soap and plastic. Ashley says it smelled like trees. Hmmm… I guess that is just one of the hazards of being a lesbian. You never really know what semen smells like. ;)

After I laid there for 20 minutes, my timer went off, I got dressed, and we left! We are able to take a pregnancy test on the 10th of August. They want us to wait that long because of the HCG trigger shot that I took. HCG is the hormone that a pregnancy test detects in urine, so if I take one too soon I will get a false positive. One of the ladies in the waiting room said that she knows women who have bought a bunch of the 88 cent tests from Walmart and test almost daily so they can track the HCG leaving their urine. Once they start getting negatives, they wait a while and take another. If it’s positive, you can rest assured that it wasn’t because of the trigger shot! It’s a good idea, we will probably do it :D

I went to a special compounding pharmacy in Phoenix to get 60 days worth of progesterone lozenges. I am supposed to take them day and night, letting them dissolve under my tongue. This will keep the lining of my uterus from shedding and causing an early miscarriage. The pharmacist said that there is a good chance that they will make me very tired, so I’m hoping I will dodge that bullet. I’m already tired enough!

Well, hopefully this will be my last post for a while! From this point, we have a couple of things to look out for. One of these situations will be happening in the next few weeks:

1. I take a test on August 10th and it’s POSITIVE! – I go in to see Dr. Nemiro, he will check out the baby and he will be my OB until 12 weeks.

2. I take a test on August 10th and it’s negative – I wait to start my period again, and we start all over again, starting with taking Clomid.

3. I start my period before August 10th – I go in immediately to start all over again with the Clomid.

Here’s hoping it’s #1!!!

– D

Fat Follicles, Triggers and The Insemination!

So, I went back in to see Dr. Nemiro on Friday to have another look at my follicles. My biggest on Thursday was 12mm, so I wasn’t expecting much. When Dr. Nemiro came in, he told me straight up that if they weren’t good today, we weren’t going to continue with this cycle. That made me really nervous. As soon as he started the ultrasound, a HUGE follicle came into view. 16mm! That’s 4mm growth overnight!! Here is is:

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I met with one of the lab girls, and she gave me the HCG for my trigger injection. I thought, no big deal, I can give myself a shot in the ass. So I took it home with the intention of having Ashley shoot me up at 4pm today. I completely wimped out. I called Lili, asked her if I thought her mom would do it for me, and she was all for it! Thank goodness I have a nurse 2 min down the road. Especially because she did it so quickly, and I was aiming way lower when I was going to have Ashley do it! Yikes. Erika saved my ass. Literally!

So, I’ve had 10,00 iu of HCG, which will force me to ovulate. In 42 hours (10am on Monday), I will be ready for insemination!!! I am really sad that Ashley can’t be there, since she just started this new job, it’s just not going to be able to happen. Our first priority will just be to GET PREGNANT lol!

I’ll be sure to post another update on Monday after the insemination. Fingers crossed, I hope this will work on the first try 😀

D

Slow Cooker

I have the crock pot of the ovarian world! My measurements today were pretty close to the same. The ultrasound tech is super sweet, really positive and great at her job, and she was nice enough to promise me a time slot tomorrow afternoon for another ultrasound just to check on them again. She also wants me back on Monday for another one. She said that she hopes I will be good to go on Monday, giving us an insemination date of Wednesday the 25th (my mom’s birthday!). I’m a little bummed still, which I know is stupid, but its rough. I’ve wanted this for so long and it’s hard to be patient. I just need to remember that I’m a Hufflepuff, and there’s no room for impatience in my life 😉

I’ll post again tomorrow. I’m also going to ask her for a picture of my ovaries!

Peace out,
D